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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had a long thread on here last spring about how my sister found her adoptive birth parents on Ancestry.com and the parents didn't want to be found.

While the thread was useful to me, it's been hard seeing my sister on this journey. She's found so many birth relatives and it's been hard for my parents to watch. Bio fam has so many issues. She had no attachment issues with my parents and we were a very loving family. She wasn't a replacement kid as someone said upthread. She was wanted and [b]given a really nice UMC life[/b] complete with a warm family and huge extended family. She looked just like us (which is sometimes a reason adoptees don't feel like they fit in).

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/index/posts/list/723579.page

But for the OP- I know that my parents are still so happy they adopted her. They would do it all again in an instant (I'm sure that thought hasn't crossed their minds). She did find her bio family and is spending Thanksgiving and Christmas with them this year, but it's not like she's left our family, it's more like she got married and now has inlaws. Don't let that fear stop you from adopting a child. [/quote]

This attitude is your fatal flaw. That was hard to read. [/quote]

PP here.  :cry: I didn't mean that in a nasty way. I was responding to a pp who stated:

"I don't think its any more than any other person who didn't have a good childhood or fit in. One problem I see is that kids are often adopted as replacement kids for biological children they couldn't have and they are always generally second best. Parents/kids have very different personalities and interests and if the parents don't take the time to foster their interests and make it a priority, then kids don't feel like they belong. (but this easily happens in other families as well). It also depends on how adoption is presented, if the person has mental health issues, which can be biological, how good of a family fit, why they were placed, what opportunities and upbringing they had, etc. "

She did have a good childhood and was treated identical to me (like most adopted kids!). 
[/quote]

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