Reply to Cannot cope with my 15-yo DS dating

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm on the OP's side. [b] We do not let our 15 year old girl to 'date.'[/b]  She goes to school dances with friends.  I know that she is probably dancing with boys at the dance, and who knows what happens at bigger parties.  And we are fine with her chatting, etc. with boys on the phone.  But we think she should focus on her studies and her sports and not get drawn into the drama of dating, boyfriends, breakups, etc.

I understand what some are saying about dating in HS being like having training wheels.  But HS kids are so immature that they NEED the training wheels and guidance.   I can see my dd maturing a lot between 14 and 15 and hope to see more between 15 and 18.  At 18, I think you are more ready for the drama (and hopefully can better avoid some of it).[/quote]

That's what my mom thought.....
I think a better approach is to be honest with your kids about your concerns.  As in, "I don't want to forbid you from dating, and you're at an age where you're going to make some of your own choices, but these are my concerns.  I worry that when you're a teen, emotions are all really intense, and that you might think you're in love with someone and make decisions that will affect you long-term based on what are really intense but short-term feelings.  I worry that the boys are not very mature and don't know how to treat girls well at that age, and that you won't have the independence to stand up to them when they take advantage. ..."  Whatever.  I actually haven't tried this yet, as mine is a couple years away from that, but I feel like it's probably more helpful to explain what the concerns are then to just ban dating.  [/quote]

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