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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I moved out on my DH and only after that, did he agree to therapy. The therapist made it clear without saying so that once one person has already moved out, it's much harder to come back together. And in the end, we did not. Just one anecdote for you. [/quote]

Agree. It is not an ultimatum. It is just a step to divorce. The guy will love it since all his household and child raising responsibilities went away— mom will take care if that and he can show up for fun dinners and weekend activities—and he can refocus on working late/his career plus dating and acting like a victim of a crazy ex wife. The woman will just keep on running a busy household, raising and parenting her kids and her full time job as well. Oh and will be a secretary for her ex husband’s “Co parenting”  schedule.[/quote]

This is spot on for myself and everyone of my girlfriends. We take on the full mental load of scheduling, school activities, doctor’s appointments, clothing the children, carpool arrangements, school projects, etc....our Exes or STBXs have DCs every other weekend (often canceling)...can barely take them to things like a game or Birthday party....have to text us to see when it is  despite it being clearly marked on the calendar. They do not do laundry, feed the kids Pizza or other takeout, do not enforce bedtime and it’s a free for all with the screens. The DCs come home and we get to deal with them being tired and having homework that is not been done. There is only one exception to this I personally know of and that is where the Mother left and moved to Europe. The Dad has an Au Pair and a a Nanny as well as a house cleaner.[/quote]

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