Reply to How your father treats you determines your future relationships with men

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[quote=Anonymous]When we are young girls, our Fathers are our first Male family figures in our lives.

As young children, we think our parents are utterly perfect.
We do not see any flaws at all in them.
And we associate home = love.

And that usually means that our home life engrains in us how & what we use to set our personal bar up to what defines love to us.

For instance, say you grow up in a home where your Father is a liar, cheater, abuser or addict.
You are attaching those characteristics w/the actual term “love.”

As you grow + form adult relationships w/Male partners, then the things that you saw your Father do in your childhood home are things you look at in a future partner.

Reason being is these characteristics are very familiar and were the bar that set up your first definition of love.

Many of us like staying inside our comfort zones.
Therefore we gravitate toward what is very familiar to us.

Like another poster stated - even if that thing is bad.

It’s an unconscious behavior that needs counseling in order to retrain us to learn the tools to use to step out of our comfort zones.[/quote]

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