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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My dad has dementia and is violent when upset.  His dementia actually looks like mental illness (to me at least).   He has now assaulted a second caregiver.  He remains physically very robust. Anger was always his go-to emotion before he was ill.  My sister who has guardianship and actually works in the nursing home industry says there's nowhere for him to go.  My other sister and I think he needs to go into memory care but I know that places can be selective. What are my options?  [/quote]

Your sister in the industry is right.  Nursing homes will accept him, if you are not totally transparent (or, in other words, if you are optimistic) in your information sharing... but will discharge him/evict him after a few months when they find out they cannot care for him. And really, you don’t want to do that to them, their caregivers, but most especially your father.

Does your father have a gerontologist or mental health physician?  What about a social worker?

The folks suggesting he be put on an off label anti-psychotic (likely black box) are accurate but the state of the industry is shameful - mostly because of a lack of true mental health resources / funding across the country.  If you do not find a good place they will get the house doc to dope him up to “manage behaviors” and it will shorten his life.

If you just go to a facility ask about which programmatic interventions they use to manage behaviors (validation method, brain health activities, music therapy) - if they can talk to it, much likelier they will use it. [/quote]

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