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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t understand why women can’t make a small effort a few times a week for the good of the family. I don’t get it. It seems like all it takes to make my DH happy (and most other men out there) is to have sex 2-3 times a week. We have two small kids (5 and almost 3 and I am pregnant with a third). Sex is the last thing on my mind 99% of the time, but I do it for him. I even usually enjoy it once we get started. [/quote]

I think there are two basic categories of women for whom this is problematic: 
1) Those who usually don't enjoy it, even after they get started; and
2) Those who feel like they should be in the mood prior to having sex, otherwise it's a violation.

Those in category 2 would probably do well to read something like "Come As You Are" and learn about responsive desire; learn that sex where desire comes after the process is underway can still be good sex and good for the marriage. On the other hand, those in category 1 shouldn't be expected to just lay back and take it.

Men should also learn about responsive desire so that they don't create a new problem by getting pissy about having to initiate almost all of the time. [/quote]
Women in either category 1 or 2 ought not be overly plussed about monogamy.  [/quote]

Yeah, but they will be. Because when he's not having sex, it's no biggie - just go masturbate. Sex is only about friction and orgasms. But when he's having sex with someone else, sex creates an emotional bond that is threatening to the marriage.[/quote]

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