Reply to Are love and physical attraction different (conceptually) to you?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Absolutely! Frankly, it's a pretty dumb question. [/quote]

I guess my girlfriend is dumb then. I'll be sure to tell her that. She doesn't understand how the way she styles herself (makeup vs. none, form fitting bodycon dress vs. boxy unflattering tunic style dress, tan vs. pale, etc) has a direct impact on how physically enticing she is. She says that her attraction for me is linked to her love for me such that when I gain weight it doesn't make her find me less attractive. I honestly find it hard to believe but maybe she's just a nice person?[/quote]

I say this gently. As a woman, what she means is that what she found attractive about you to begin with wasn't your physical attributes.

But your post seems to indicate that you're becoming less attracted to her in part because of a lack of self care. As someone who has BTDT with a spouse who let themselves go, be clear that you have a need for her to keep herself up. Otherwise you could find yourself with a wife 75lbs higher and with cheese powder stains on her tshirts, and then things become much harder. Foot down now, while you still can. (Yes, I'm a woman, and all this body positive stuff ignores the impact on health, energy levels, and relationships.)[/quote]

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