Reply to Threatened estrangement/emotional blackmail

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DIL regularly threatens to cut off access to her kids.. I understand she is stressed but[b] I'm available any time she needs a sitter, without fail. [/b]Anytime we have the slightest disagreement this comes up. I'd happily take her up on it except my grandkids would suffer. I'm so sick of her diva drama queen behavior.
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Stop doing this. Tell her you'll deal with her [b]when she wants to be an adult.[/b] She will come back because she needs the childcare (where is your son??) and you can do it again when it happens, and it will.[/quote]

What makes you think she needs OP for childcare?[/quote]

I agree you should stop being so available, but I totally disagree with "when she wants to be an adult." It's patronizing and will alienate her. We can't decide if she is being a baby or has legitimate reasons to be angry because so little info has been shared. It takes 2 to tango. Whether the issue is you keep letting yourself be sucked back in with someone unstable or that you refuse to admit your part in  creating drama, this does not happen without 2 people. Yes, you love your grandchildren. They need a happy mom and if your interactions are so toxic (even by the rare chance it ONLY her fault) then a break/breather might be healthy for everyone.

Also, your son chose this person for a reason. Respect that decision and don't demonize her.[/quote]

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