Reply to My mom is being manipulative

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "My mom is being manipulative "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I recently moved back home with my parents. I was getting my BA and lived near campus. Due to financial issues, I had to move back home since I had to take out loans. Last fall I applied to a masters program and got rejected. I’m currently working as a nanny and [b]I haven’t taken another job mainly because all the offers have a lower salary than I currently make.[/b] Last night, I got home really late and my mom was upset. One of the reasons that led me to move out was having a 10 pm curfew even though I was 21. 
[b]My mom then goes on to tell me that I have to apply to multiple masters program this fall.[/b] Or else, I’ll have to start contributing financially. 
I don’t mind, but when I asked to move back home she said I didn’t have to pay for anything and try to pay down my loans. The only reason she’s saying I have to apply or else she’ll start asking me for money, is because I said I didn’t want to apply this fall. I told her I would apply next fall. She wants me to do it this fall because she worries I’ll lose my motivation for wanting to go to grad school. 
I don’t expect my parents to always be able to help me out, but I feel like she’s being manipulative and trying to get her way. 
My undergrad loans left a sour note in my mouth and [b]I would  have to take out more loans to get my masters.[/b] 
I might also not even get it. But, I rather not do it this fall because I’ll only be doing it to please my mom. I want to get a masters degree, but I want to wait another year. It took me 5 years to get my BA and I have mental health issues that I’ve been dealing with as well (I rather focus on trying to work through my issues). 5 years were really long and stressful so I would like to wait. 
What would you do in this situation? [/quote]

1.  Do you want to be a nanny forever (there's nothing wrong with that, but I sense from your post this isn't what you want)?  If not, take one of those lower-paying jobs in your desired industry.  Many people start with lower-paying jobs, then work their way up.

2.  Your mom is right: you SHOULD apply to multiple institutions.  (Why did you apply to only one school last time?  This was a bad move).  Part of the reason you should apply to multiple schools is the possibility of being rejected from one/some, and also, in the case of multiple admission offers, you could then choose the best fellowship/scholarship offer.  This brings me to my next point:

3.  If you have to take out loans to pay for grad school, you don't belong in grad school (law/medicine are exceptions).  I say this as a person with two graduate degrees, both of which were paid for by a combo of scholarships/teaching fellowships.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics