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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let me guess - RMIB? Oh wait. RMIB students get less than 6-7 hours a night on a school day.  Must be some other program!

Here's what you do for her- 
- cut down on non-essential socialization and make sure that sleep becomes a priority.  
- get her in the habit of not check her social media account when doing homework. Even a quick peek takes 15 minutes especially when all the peers are messaging each other while doing homework
- Nap after school for 30 minutes. 
- Pare down ECs and social obligations.
- Make sure she is getting top notch nutrition as well as some exercise every day.

Mom and dad should not remain awake with their HS DC at night - even as a show of support to them.  You cannot have all family members be sleep deprived.

[quote=Anonymous]OP here- bingo you guessed.  It's a magnet though I won't say which one.
[/quote][/quote]

I was able to guess because I cud have written your post. My kid was in RMIB. 1st year was brutal for the entire family. I used to feel guilty when my kid was awake so I used to remain awake too. What if DS needed help? What if they needed a hot beverage? As a first time magnet parent, who was not fully aware of what magnet entailed, I was floundering and feeling very guilty about the amount of work that my kid was doing.

No one can convey to you how much work and sacrifice is involved when your kid goes to a magnet program because what you hear is "Magnet is very hard. Its a lot of work. It is not easy. blah, blah, blah" - and you think that you understand what that means.  However, it is not one day of sleeping late. It is a relentless and chronic daily pattern of late nights, multiple projects, assignments etc in a very stressful environment. Of course, no one else is admitting that sleep deprivation is a problem with their kid either, so you feel that you are all alone and doing something wrong.  Getting good grades and doing well is not the issue, these kids are already very bright and motivated. The issue  becomes the lack of sleep, because these are teens and they are also at time distracted and procrastinating. However, since the program pace is so fast, they cannot afford to procrastinate.

So this is what we did - we become sleep Nazis and pretty much shielded our kid from any social obligation where his presence was not mandatory. The only events he attended was those he wanted to attend - mainly school based.  We cut down his EC activities that required a huge time committment (Theater for example).  He was not required to do any chores for all the HS years. One thing we did with our DC was to do drop off and pick up from school or any other place he needed to be. We had blankets and pillows in the car and he could sleep for additional minutes to and from the school. + he saved on the additional time required to get to the bus-stop and wait there.  Finally, breakfast was served in the car.  I made sure he had a hot meal in the car so he could eat his breakfast and then nap or chill in the car.  Oh, and I started to sleep on time myself and stopped worrying about him. I figured he was a teen while I was a middle aged person. I would not recover from lack of sleep while he could.

Finally, it is a marathon for 4 years in RMIB (in other magnets, seniors have it easier once they have their college acceptance). - so make use of holidays, snow-days and breaks, since that's an excellent time to catch up on sleep AND work ahead AND do something fun with friends.

I am sure some posters will write "Oh that's why we did not want our kids to go to magnet. We wanted them to have a normal HS experience."  Disregard them. Magnets are the best education for your kid and many of the issues that other HS parents face with their kids having a lot of leisure time on their hands will never be a problem for you or your daughter. They go to college very well prepared to succeed and they get a solid education.  Besides I have yet to meet anyone who got into magnet program and then decided not to do it.

Your child has finished one year. She only has two and a half more years to go. So this will end one day.  She will become more organized and she will learn to prioritize. Your job as parents is to take care of your own health, lend logistical support (and a lot of emotional support), provide good nutrition to the entire family and make sure that your kid rests.  Ask  her to reduce her social media usage and  reduce the time she is  online on her devices.  The magnet kids cannot afford to be on the devices all the time. Make sure she is getting enough exercise (use the treadmill if she is not in sports) and she is eating her vitamins etc.  Also, she will learn to work smart and fast very soon.

For her emotional well being, help her to participate and enjoy the  big HS social moments - homecoming, prom, Mr. RM etc and figure out how they can enjoy all of that without too much investment of time and energy preparing for that.  A friend whose DD was in the RMIB program used to buy several dresses and shoes for her daughter before any formal event because the kid did not have the time to go shopping. The daughter would try on the dresses at home, pick one that she liked from the dozens (that's right - dozens) that her mother bought and the next day her mom was back at the stores returning the dresses that the daughter did not want.  I was so glad I had a boy who did not need all of that for formal events.

Good luck. [/quote]

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