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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How about my husband? Half a bottle of wine every night, usually after everyone (often times including me) goes to bed. Very rare non-drinking days. I’ve asked him to cut back and he did for a day here and there, but he’s back to half bottle every night. Mostly alone. [/quote]

NP. To both this PP and to OP too-- Yes, you should be concerned and consider whether he has a problem. Alcoholism does not necessarily mean the person gets stumbling drunk, or drinks at work or day times, or drinks liquor. It presents differently in every person and could present as wine, at night, bothering no one else at all. PP, the fact your DH drinks every night and "mostly alone" and, importantly, won't or can't stop for more than a night or two is a red flag.

Does he say things like:
It helps me relax (every single night? If he can't relax without it, that's a red flag)
I need it to sleep (ditto the above)
At least I'm here at home and not at a bar
It's only wine
I don't hide it, so I can't be an alcoholic because they hide it
I can't have a problem because I do not get drunk, just relaxed
I don't binge, I drink the same amount each time, I always stop after half a bottle

Those can all be true and he may not be an alcoholic. They can all be true and he CAN be an alcoholic. The seven days a week consumption and the stopping only for a day or two when asked would concern me.

Find an Al-Anon meeting for yourself (not AA but Al-Anon, which is for family members of alcoholics, not for alcoholics themselves.) Go, and talk with people who have been where you are now and who can help you gauge whether there might be a problem. OP, you too, not just PP--find Al-Anon. And ask yourself if you hear things like the statements above from your DH.[/quote]

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