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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I totally understand how you feel. I always think about the “what if’s” which I know isn’t productive but I still think about the path not taken.

My situation is a bit different... I had my first at 32 and he was a very challenging baby and toddler. Colic, extreme reflux, didn’t sleep. I was miserable from ages 0-3. He literally almost broke me (of course I love him more than anything - he was just very hard). DH and I couldn’t even think of having another until DS was 3, when a switch flipped and he became the most amazing, calm and happy little boy. We finally decided it was time to start trying and 3 years later we’ve had no luck. DS is 6 now and I think we are ready to throw in the towel.

My two regrets are:

1. Not trying sooner, like when he was 2, because yes it would have been even harder with 2 young kids but that would be better than not having a second at all. Plus going back to having a baby and a 7 year old does not seen that awesome to me.

2. The first RE I met with diagnosed me with DOR and told me not to waste time and just go to DE. We said no way but if I could do it over again we would have jumped in that right away.[/quote]

OP here.  Thanks for sharing your situation--I can definitely relate!  My regret focuses on waiting too long to have #1, because I got pregnant right away the first time and maybe if I had had #1 a few years earlier then I could have had a second.  I never imagined that I would be diagnosed as "infertile" when I still had an infant under 12 months old!  That was definitely hard to learn.

I am not interested in DE personally, and would not have gone that route no matter what.  It appears I have implantation problems, so DE/donor embryo probably wouldn't have worked anyways.

I'm interested in how you have coped with the regret about not trying for a second sooner--how are you dealing with it?[/quote]

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