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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm sorry that you are experiencing divorce (since this wasn't your choice). 
My thoughts:
1) Ensure that you have an equitable arrangement with DH with daycare/health care expenses included in the mix. Get a good lawyer.  Keep track of what you spend on children etc. (e.g. if you're making HSA contributions and then use it for a co-pay that's part of your spending on them).  Don't think of this as nickel and diming your kids but rather a way to ensure that they will get the resources they need from both of you--and greater ability for you to preserve your assets to provide stability for them.

2) Figure out how student loans will be handled (talk with lawyer).  Are you responsible for any of his? Just yours? Even split?

3) You don't list your retirement contributions.  Are those part of what's coming out of your gross pay?  If not, that should be set to max out--at your pay level you'll just be paying that in taxes anyway.

4) Don't drop life insurance.  The lawyers may have an estimate of what you have to carry.  It's not a big expense and it's necessary for your kids' well-being.

5) Don't get cable when you move.  Let Amazon Prime/Netflix/Hulu or whatever combo you prefer fill your entertainment needs.

6) Do you have funds for a down payment on a house?  If not, you probably can't/shouldn't get a house yet.  Rent until you do if you can rent while keeping the daycare.  Financial stability provides more stability than a house.  It's not a huge deal to switch schools in the early grades if you end up not finding a house where you rent--teaches kids adaptability. Keep your rent under 3K/mo. if you can--the lower the better.

7) Your daycare sounds great--don't try to whittle that away.

8) Look on-line at budgets to see line items you might not be thinking about (cell phones, disability insurance--that's an important one if you don't have it).

Good luck![/quote]

Thank you!! This is very helpful[/quote]

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