Reply to A perfectly nice date

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I sure can't figure out whether I want to sleep with someone in three dates, or even five or six for that matter.
That's not enough time for me.
If he asks you out again, go out with him again. Don't sleep with someone until you really want to and feel comfortable doing so. This three date thing is a myth propagated by men trying to rush women into sex.[/quote]

It's not a myth or a hard fast rule. I'm not dating right now but if I were, I'm too far along in life to go through some extended courtship. If it's purely companionship I need, I have friends. If I'm dating it's because I'm attracted to you and I have romantic interests. If I dont think those interests are being returned, I'm going to move on. I'm not a kid trying to impress someone. I'm an adult that knows what I want and like.[/quote]

"if those interests are being returned"? [b]why do you think a woman is saying yes to continued dates? it's because she is interested in dating you and eventually having sex with you[/b]. women don't waste their time going in dates with men in whom they have no romantic interest. But many of us want to spend time getting to know someone before sleeping with him. You cant tell who someone really is after three dates, esp someone you just met online. I don't want to have sex with a man who is still online, still dating and possibly sleeping with others, etc. I need to know it's monogamous and it's a relationship. You can't know that after three dates. [/quote]

Woman here and some woman do say yes to dates with guys they aren’t sure about.  They could be trying to convince themselves that they should like this guy because he seems good on paper or despite lack of chemistry on her part she should see if things develop.  I don’t necessarily follow the three date rule in regards to sex but I won’t go on third date if I don’t think there is both emotional and sexual chemistry and potential for a relationship.

So OP, if you are attracted to him, you can ask him on a date and pick something where you get to know him.  I think there was a post awhile back on good early on dates other than coffee/dinner/movies.  While on the date, you can give non-verbal clues that you are interested romantically.  The thing is if he is interested in you romantically if you are giving off signs that you just want to be friends,he will assume he is wasting his time.  While sex is definitely a clear signal of more than just friends there are other ways to flirt and communicate that you are interested but not yet ready.
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