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[quote=Anonymous]I think it's genetic, honestly.

I freakin' love how I feel on painkillers.  Love it.  I've only had them twice in my life but I totally get the appeal and that's absolutely terrifying to me.

Genetically speaking, my dad is a recovered alcoholic and my sibling is a current alcoholic (who denies they have a problem), so addiction is definitely in my genes.

Even though I loved being on the painkillers and loved the way I felt while on them, there was still a part of my brain that knew that once I wasn't in pain, I didn't get to take them anymore.  I'm pretty scared that the next time I have an issue that requires them, that part of my brain won't be there and I'll become addicted.

I had a minor break last summer and refused the Oxy the doctor was offering because of this fear.  First of all, it wasn't that much pain and second of all, I was alone and the time and didn't have anyone in my life who would be able to immediately recognize if I developed a problem or was spiraling.  After realizing how much I loved being on painkillers after the first time I got them, the next time they were prescribed to me, I made sure to tell someone I was on them and made sure they kind of just watched out for me.      [/quote]

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