Reply to Closed Adoption and found the birth mother

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Reply to "Closed Adoption and found the birth mother"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think your sister is right-- that she can contact them if she wishes.... BUT she needs to think about the end game here. What is the point of this? If she is only going to get rebuffed by the extended family and maybe eventually her birth mother, she should tread cautiously if only to protect her own heart. The message sent should be along the lines of, "I'm happy and healthy and would love to connect if you want to. I can be reached at xxxx." the end.

I also don't have a lot of sympathy for birth parents who, decades later, aren't able to give their own child the time of day. But that's another discussion. [/quote]

Why? She could have had an abortion and never thought about it again. I think the woman still deserves respect. [/quote]

Respect? Sure. But the pain of being an adopted child can be significant. That birth mother made a choice to do an adoption that was all about her needs and not about the child's. The child didn't ask to come into the world, but the mother surely can give her some respect in between 20+ years later. [/quote]

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