Reply to Separated for 2yrs—going from 50/50 to me being primary

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Reply to "Separated for 2yrs—going from 50/50 to me being primary"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, this is hard. You do damage control by being a strong and centered mom. You do damage control by letting them be angry with you and not retaliating. You do damage control by NEVER saying anything negative about their dad or their relationship with their dad.

I’ve been there, and it is SO HARD. But it is doable, and you will maintain a solid relationship with your kids this way.

Something I learned very early (I’ve been a single mom with sole legal/primary physical custody for more than 8 years) is that if you say something negative about dad it will harm the kids relationship WITH YOU. It won’t hurt their relationship with dad. The opposite is also true. I’m taking long term here - you prevent the damage by staying calm, centered, and by recognizing that you are mom and no one can replace you.

Play the long game. How your kids feel today or tomorrow or next month is less important than how they feel as an adult looking back. Be the adult, and everything will be OK. I promise. [/quote]

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