Reply to Not seeing grandson is making FIL sick

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What you do is keep your distance a bit and be a support to your DH, while remaining as gentle as possible.

[b]When DH reports this you say "Honey, you know that's not true right?  Your dad is not sick because he isn't face timing with Junior every day."[/b][/quote]

And add: "If he's really truly crying every day because he can't see DS, which I doubt, but if it is true, he needs to be treated for depression. Seeing our DS more isn't going to fix that."[/quote]

I think you both have good comments that I want to weave into my conversation with DH tonight.[/quote]

NP and I agree with the PPs.

Also, as the grandchild of people who were also like this but (thankfully) to a much lesser degree, I can say it only gets worse as the child gets older.  Eventually, your ILs will start guilting your child and as a kid, it's hard/impossible to really understand that "No, grandpa isn't going to die if I don't go visit him this weekend."  I ended up avoiding them way more than I would have otherwise because every interaction was so painful and guilt ridden.

Eventually, my kid brain translated their statements of "I'm just so sick when I don't get to see you" into "my presence is a magical thing that protects my loved ones" which further weirdly morphed into "well if I'm so magical, what will happen to my PARENTS if I'm not around?" and then 6 year old me started believing my parents were going to die if I spent a night at anyone else's house EVER.  So, yea, get this crap shut down ASAP.[/quote]

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