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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I was with you until you mentioned all your hobbies and friends and sports. You certainly need to have people in your life that like you. I am just wondering if you have been spending too much time with other people and on other activities other than your family. Most people have a period of ramping up back into the single life after a divorce. You seem like you could get back in with no transition period and that has me wondering. Much of spending time with teenagers is just occupying the same space as they are. Ditto for your wife. It has to happen when everybody is open and ready to communicate which won't happen if you are busy with other things. Maybe your wife has some validity to her complaints. That being said, it's odd that she wants to stay married but doesn't want you to touch her. All humans need physical touch and adults need romantic and sexual touch in an appropriate relationship. Marriage is the ultimate appropriate relationship.  I would tell your wife that you will make her and the kids your main priority, and also say that if she won't agree to some type of physical touch, the marriage is over.  Sometimes you do need to say "we fix this today or it's over" and I think you've reached that point.

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OP here, I have always had friends and hobbies and sport all the way back since when I was in high school. That has never been part of the equation --- I don't exclude it might surface back next week, but so far that has not been the issue. Nor the kids, for what is worth: each of us goes along amazingly well with them and spends time and energy with them. Time together never seems to have been a problem to be honest, and priority in the sense of spending time with the family has never been brought up. DW problem seems to be that I told her things I should not have said ten years ago, or that I yelled seven years ago, or that I was not kind enough in 2009, or something else that, when needed, comes back haunting her, and us.[/quote]

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