Reply to Where to hide money to plan an exit?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Where to hide money to plan an exit?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Could you really withdraw enough cash to make a difference? Wouldn’t the forensic accountant ask what you did with all the withdrawals?[/quote]

$5,000 may or may not even cover a divorce lawyer’s retainer, depending on how pricey your divorce lawyer is. For just a 2-bedroom apartment (you have 3 kids? How old are they) in a decent neighborhood near the metro (so you can commute to work) you’re looking at at least $2,000 a month plus probably that amount again for a security deposit. You may be able to find something cheaper.

It will take at least several months, probably much longer, to hammer out a separation agreement and then you need a judge to approve it. With your income ratio, you will probably get child support even with 50-50 custody, but it won’t start officially until you have a court-approved agreement. It will take at least a year, probably 2-3 years, before your marital assets like pensions are split and you’re free to access them, although you don’t want to drain your pensions.

File immediately for divorce, don’t wait. Back child support dates from the date you file, not from the date you leave. The mistake I made was to believe XDH and his pricey lawyer when they said they wanted to negotiate an amicable agreement. They didn’t, and that became clear when they started transmitting ridiculous demands six months later. I didn’t get any child support until I filed in court, even though both teens chose to live with me 100% of the time. Possibly your DH is nicer than mine, but don’t count on it, I thought I married a nice guy 20 years ago. Stalling is really a thing, and his divorce lawyer may encourage him not to give you anything unless you file.

Unless you think he will voluntarily help you with expenses as soon as you leave, you need to plan for the longer term.

Since you control the finances, I would make sure you have $10,000 in your savings account—and make sure he has the exact same amount in his bank account, too. Whatever you sock away, make sure you sock away an equal amount for him. Then declare your account to your lawyers and the judge. Marital assets are split 50-50 and you should be ok.

Then, since he’s potentially violent, I’m with the pps who suggest giving at least $5,000 cash to a friend or family member, or put it in a locked box—nothing with your name on it like a safety deposit box. Your DH and his lawyers probably wouldn’t figure out you have a safety deposit box, but if they do you’ll have a lot of explaining to do. Anyway, do you want to be a person who lies on court documents about something tangible like a secret safety deposit box? Re forensic accountants, I’m pretty sure my scummy XDH was hiding money and my sister offered to pay for a forensic accountant. But my lawyers said that unless you have a smoking gun, like you can give the forensic accountant leads to a condo he bought for his AP, they may not find anything. Even if they do, a few hundred extra a month gone missing can really easily be justified as family/household expenses and it’s not worth anybody's lawyer’s or forensic accountant’s fees to try to prove otherwise. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics