Reply to Give me permission to just not visit my dad this Christmas please

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. I get it, I really do. I’m just curious how other people cope with things like this? Tired doesn’t even cover how I feel-more like exhausted, gutted. It feels like my whole life involves sucking it up and doing what I don’t want to do. I know that’s partially adulthood, but sometimes it just goes too far. The only way I get through the week is knowing that on Sunday morning I can go to therapy for one hour and on Saturday evening I can watch 2-3 hours of tv. This trip will take away the two things I look forward to all week. I know it’s stupid but I’m actually tearing up thinking about it.

I know I’m not the only person with a young kid and a job, why is that so overwhelming for me that when I have to fit one more thing in, I feel complete misery? Other people have more kids, harder jobs, etc. and they go see their families. It just feels insurmountable right now even though I agree I really should do this for my dad who is the nicest most understanding guy ever.[/quote]

Believe me, I understand.  We have now 6-yo twins and the first 18 months were HARD.  Added to the fact that we had no family within 1000 miles, I have a spouse who cannot drive, has many medical appointments with specialists for a genetic disorder and cannot drive.  Yes, I definitely understand how hard this all is on you and I sympathize.

That said, with your father's surgery and your promise, you need to make it happen.  Your father needs to see his daughter and granddaughter before the holidays (since he can't spend the holiday with them) and his surgery.  Can you take a day off on Friday the the 15th?  Take a day off for yourself.  Take you daughter to daycare, then take the day off, sleep, get a massage, see a movie, catch up on your TV, anything that will help your destress and cope.  Then leave Friday after "work".  Your daughter can sleep in the car.  Get there late Friday (even if you have to stay in a hotel for one night or one extra night).  Visit all day Saturday and Sunday through lunch/brunch.  After you eat, drive back Sunday afternoon and you can be ready to go again Monday.[/quote]

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