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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Help me with my totally messed up marriage, in which the abuser blames the abused"
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[quote=Anonymous]Op, I've been there too. In his moments of clarity, ex told me that he probably has PTSD from childhood. His father was a violent asshole to the whole family. So to ex it seemed normal to be rude, paranoid, impatient, violent verbally and physically. I had such a hard time getting him to talk to me calmly, or even to understand why I was offended. And of course, everything was my fault. If only i weren't so dumb and stubborn, if only I did what and how he says, we could live well together. Anyway, we split up 4 months ago and yesterday I talked with a relationship counselor friend. I told him that feel like a failure for not empathizing enough with a badly hurt partner. And he said that if someone treats you badly like that for years, it's okay to walk away and take care of yourself. I still feel like a failure. The point is that sadly, many of us feel your pain. [/quote]
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