Reply to Do men like inlaws more than women?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Because DHs are less PITA and easier going than DWs. [/quote]

This is not true. I think women stay closer to their parents and are better at managing relationships. Sons mangle their relationships and the wives suffer. [/quote]

“Managing relationships”?

I think you mean the need to control relationships. [/quote]

NP but not at all. We mean being the ones to coordinate, stay in touch, communicate, organize events, etc. Often the guys just...do not really care / can't be bothered, and the emotional and logistical work generally falls on the women. Are you a man?? [/quote]

If a guy doesn’t care enough to do this with his own family, then why, absent a compelling need to control the situation, do you?  To toss this into the pile of work getting dumped on you, it isn’t. You’re picking it up all on your own. And there’s a reason for that. So take a good long look at yourself because that’s where the problem lies.

If your husband does dump this on you, tell him to FO and grow up. Interacting with his family isn’t your job. And if you make it your job, do so voluntarily. [/quote]

Uh, well, because it's one thing for their own son to blow them off, and a different thing for his wife to be openly rude (by that I mean ignoring/rebuffing their attempts to reach out to them). As wives our hands are forced; we have to either choose to follow DH's lead and be cold, rude, unresponsive...thus driving a    a permanent wedge of hurt into the relationship, or to be the (reluctant) peacekeepers. Add grandkids in and it gets even more complicated.  I agree it should not be my job; I can also tell you that for many women, it default becomes so because the husband just doesn't care enough, and there is much stronger social expectation on women

This is not a hard concept. How are you not understanding this? [/quote]

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