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Reply to "18 y/o DD refuses to apply for SSI?"

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[quote=Anonymous]

OP - Your post is a bit confusing or it may be that there are two different girls mentioned.  However, from what I gather your daughter is 18, had an IEP for ADHD and/or a learning disability, but did graduate with a regular high school diploma.  Since graduation, she has been volunteering at a library and seeing her BF.  She is now six weeks pregnant.  You have talked to her about getting a job, but she does not seem interested.  You have also heard of SSI with the monthly cash benefit and think she ought to at least apply to see if she is eligible as a possible means of support, especially if she does not want to work.

Most importantly, if this is one and the same young girl, you need to focus on establishing a positive means of communication with DD because your first concern must be for her health (physical and possibly mental as she might just be scared at being pregnant and unable to proceed in any direction.)  You need to encourage her to see an OB or at least her primary care doctor so that she can discuss with her doctor how to proceed for the care she and her baby may need - based in great part on her ability to pay - in terms of where she can go.  Also, it may be time for her to see a therapist to help her sort out her various issues.

I think you also have to judge how much BF is going to want or is going to be interested in being a part of her life and any decision-making about what she may be going to be doing.  You are not the only one now who has DD's ear.

I agree with the prior poster(s) who have indicated to you that SSI is a means of support for individuals who in terms of a disability are truly unable to find and maintain a job.  With a high school  diploma,  your DD would at least need to have a track record of being unable to find AND keep a job to even think about qualifying.  [b]It would make a lot more sense to connect her with the Department of Rehab or Vocational Services in your area  to request an assessment to see if she would qualify for job support services or not[/b]  The assessment is FREE and any services offered would be based upon her income at age 18 now "as a family of one."  Of course, the key is to get DD to agree to 
pursue this course.

It sounds like you are realizing that DD has a lot coming at her suddenly which could well impact you and so perhaps you, too, could use some outside counseling on how to proceed.  Your daughter has made some decisions on what she wants  to do and what she does not want to be doing, and you can't just assume you can tell her what to do and the pieces will all fall together.  I know well as I have a good friend in the metro area who is dealing with DD, her DH and a baby in her home, and basically ending up taking care of all three as neither young adult has the ability to be a parent first, and they are age 30.  So get help to straighten things out now as you can for DD and set your limits or it will go on and on.

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