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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you avoid being her keeper by simply refusing to do it when the time comes.  I have abusive parents who I refuse to have a relationship.  I am fully prepared, that when they need help when they are very old and sick to simply not provide it.  They will not live with me, I will not support them financially, I will not visit.  They can live on the street for all I care.  If you don't want to help, don't.  [/quote]

[b]I love this so much!! I'm stealing this plan for dealing with my abusive parents!![/b][/quote]

Is this sarcasm or could you really not come up with this idea on your own?[/quote]

No, not sarcasm. I guess seeing someone else do it helps me give myself permission to take the same approach.[/quote]

[b]She doesn't have ADHD, [/b]she's greedy and has always sort of seen herself as a "grand lady" She has so much jewelry, much of it sterling and gold, that she could wear a necklace ever day for a year and not repeat yet she still buys more. She was always shopping/collecting on behalf of  her kids until they distanced themselves. Her office made her take down an Xmas tree which she decorated for every holiday. At least two rooms plus the garage in her home are packed floor to ceiling with cardboard boxes full of her collections, some of which have possible resale value but are so vast that I don't know how anyone will ever sort it out. If I were married to her I think I'd also be an alcoholic. [/quote]

You don't know that unless you've seen the psychiatrist's report, OP. ADHD is not just the hyper kind. Hoarders are usually the daydreaming, inattentive kind who feel completely overwhelmed trying to sort their stuff and therefore don't. 
I hope you understand she's severely mentally ill. 
[/quote]

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