Reply to Crazy to talk marriage after one month of dating?

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[quote=Anonymous]You cannot know someone's true character after so little time, especially when they are smitten with you and wanting to bend over backwards to please you. The feeling that you "just know" and truly connect to and understand this person is all part and parcel of infatuation. We've all experienced it, it's normal, and many people go through this intense feeling of having found the one earlier in life. But most of those relationships fall apart prior to marriage.

Look, this could lead to a long, happy marriage. It could also end very badly after you entwine your life with this man and feel trapped once the character flaws and incompatibilities come to a head. I've never been in an abusive relationship, but I spent my twenties falling hard and fast for several men who weren't right for me in the end - but for the first six months or so I would have sworn I found my true love. My last relationship before I met my now-husband was a wake up call. I was so, so fortunate to be older, wiser, and able to spot the controlling tendencies and grooming for abuse. Like most of my previous relationships, it started with getting serious too fast, talking marriage and babies. Then he started to act entitled to my time, attention, money, and input in my decision making. I wasn't "allowed" to be in the same place with a former colleague whom I had briefly dated years earlier. He sulked and pouted in social situations when I wasn't paying him enough attention. He followed me home after I left a social event angry at him. He sulked and pouted that my birthday gift to him was stingy. He came to the home I shared with roommates one night after being out with his friends and started cooking himself a meal in our kitchen without asking. I was so fortunate to be able to end it with him - and I continued to get texts months later alternately berating me and saying "I love you".

You need to let this relationship unfold naturally. Take a step back. Be wary. If it's right, it will be right two years from now.[/quote]

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