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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm sorry your thread has been derailed, OP.  I've been in a similar position as you and this is what I would recommend:
1.  You need to 'control' for those things in your home life that are contributing to your DS's dysregulation.
2.  Brush up on your parenting techniques and re-evaluate your home routine.
3.  Taking a class from Dr Shapiro would be a good way to assess if what you're doing at home could be improved. http://www.parentchildjourney.com/journey/
4.  Make sure your DS has excellent sleep hygiene
5.  You may consider eliminating all screen time for everyone during the week (even for my NT kid, transitions to/from screen time was tough)
6.  Try to identify triggers and patters to your DS's behaviors.  A log may be helpful.  Find out what he did at school the days he has a meltdown at home.

If, after controlling for these things, you DS is still dysregulated, your next steps will become more clear.  Any service provider you see at that point will want to know what you're doing at home and how you've tried to address it - how you've tried to 'control' for it.

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I agree with this 100%.

My son has difficulties with emotional regulation and third grade was his low point.  He's now in 5th and things have gotten much better as he's matured.  However, he still takes a tremendous amount of parenting.   To be a happy, functional kid he needs a lot of sleep, regular meals, few to no last minute schedule changes and a TON of "debriefing" time and one-on-one time with us.   If he's tired or hungry or feeling marginalized by us (i.e. we're busy at work and not able to talk him through things or whatever) he suffers.  
In contrast, his sisters are practically on auto-pilot.  They're really functional on little sleep, when they're starving, etc.  They just take far, far less parenting on a day to day basis.

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My son is like this.  Immediately after school is a particularly vulnerable time for him.  I bring a protein shake that I give to him in the car.  Sometimes we stop at a park to let him play or we turn on an audiobook.  Eliminating / minimizing screen time during the week also helped.  He's completely lost screen privileges a few times, including yesterday after having a fit, so he's well aware that it's a privilege that goes away if it's causing problems.
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