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[quote=Anonymous]Oh that is frustrating for you, I am sure! I know a lot of women struggle with the desire to work, but not wanting the home/kids to fall behind in being cared for. I am a SAHM mostly, but work per diem on the days my hubby has off. I know that his time off from work is valuable to him and he struggles to be really productive, given that he needs rest. He is good at helping out with things like laundry and some dishes, but I am the 'cleaner upper' of the family, so I give grace with him not doing it when he is on his day off and with our baby. One thing I have also discovered is that men (in general- not always) struggle with multi tasking and therefore it could be difficult for them to watch the kids AND do other things (on top of being tired after a long day). If there is something specific that you struggle with (leaving diapers on the floor, for example), would that be something you could talk to him about to keep an eye out for ?
I know it's hard on the family to figure out work schedules, and especially on women as we are in the middle of trying to work but (usually) having the main responsibility to the home on top of that! My biggest encouragement is to not let work get in the way of your marriage relationship... if you feel both of you working is going to cause rifts between you two, then I would suggest that it isn't worth it. 
Good luck! I know you aren't alone in your frustrations and they can difficult to navigate
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