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[quote=Anonymous]DH grew up wealthy (like generations of wealth, trust fund to pay for his education, private school), and I grew up solidly middle class (public school, both my parents worked their way through college, parents are immigrants). We both went to elite universities (me on financial aid, his family had attended these schools for generations).

We dated for a long time, and our values are aligned so we are very happily married with kids. BUT we come at things from a very different perspective, and both have to compromise abut spending habits. It's not a matter (for us) of being able to afford things, but more where we want to spend our money. Mainly, I don't value "high-end" experiences as much as he does, and it can cause conflict. We both make good incomes, fwiw

For example: I think our nice 3000 sq ft Bethesda home is perfect and feel so proud to invite people over; he can't wait to save enough to upgrade to a 7000+ sq ft home. I think occasional long weekends and road trips are nice vacations and want budget even on our international vacations; he wants to go on high-end vacations and stay at 5 star hotels. I watch my pennies and almost never eat out, he thinks nothing of going to starbucks 3 or 4 times each day and would probably eat out every meal if it was up to him.

We socialize with both our families regularly, and try to appreciate what each family brings to our lives, and tolerate the stuff we personally don't support.  He appreciates that my parents don't judge him based on his income/profession but thinks that they are not being responsible enough about estate planning; I appreciate that his parents are so supportive of our relationship but wish they didn't use money to pressure us into certain decisions.[/quote]

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