Reply to Work: Life Balance. Myth or Attainable

Forum Index » Jobs and Careers

Reply to "Work: Life Balance. Myth or Attainable"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So, I have been married for 8 years, we have 2 kids (one in 1st grade, the other is 4). 
Up until recently we had a friend watch our kids in her home and then for 6 months a nanny who was working out fine. AFter the nanny moved we decided to put the kids in a Daycare center. Both love it and are thriving and enjoying the interaction with other kids.

However, I am struggling now more and I am not sure why. I do both drop off and pick up due to the location of my work and the center (about 2 blocks away, where DH would have to drive 10 miles out of his way one direction). So far that has been going fair, DH 'helps' a bit with the AM routine and gets them in the car.

I get home about an hour sooner so always start dinner so we can make it to nighttime classes (swim, gym etc) which DH usually takes at least one of the kids to or we all go.

My DH job pays more by about $30,000 but it is due to his field of work. I have a management position and oversee 10 staff, an office building and the overall therapy of about 40 clients. I feel burned out right now and can't tell if it is time for  a career change to something where i can just doe a job and not so much a 'career' or if it is the ages of my kids with more going on, ages where they like to fight for no reason etc.

I constantly feel like i am in charge of everything both at work and home and am getting to the point where I am just kind of over everything. I had PPD with both kids and feel I may be getting depressed again and have an appointment with a therapist next week. I just feel so..............................much a failure at work and home. I am good at my job, i know I am and have liked it, but just feel like it may be time for a change. The burn out rate for my field is high and i have been doing this for 15 years, manager for 10.

anyway, is there such thing as a healthy work/life balance? How do those who have a lot of responsibility at work handle home life projects? 
[/quote]

Where is the elementary school compared to the daycare?  Will it ease up once your youngest is in elementary school?  We had to make the same choice regrading daycares (nearer my work or nearer DH's work) so on that it is all or nothing- however- is is one more year before both are in elementary school?

What time does DH go into work and get home.  You did say that you get home an hour early, but what about the morning.  Is DH at home when you leave?

One way I have seen couple achieve life balance is to opt for a 4 day workweek.  They do this by either working 10 hours a day or reducing their workweek hours by 8/one day.  Examine work from home opportunities.  If your DH can do this once a week, he can do the daycare drop off.  This might get you to where both are in elementary school.  Longe range solutions would be for each of you to look for jobs that offer more flexibility or are closer to home.

Examine all the after dinner activities, maybe there are too many at this point in time and reducing them now would help ease things up a bit.

Make a list of what both of you do and compare.  First have each person make the list of the things that they do- frequently we tend to "forget" or discount some of the things that our spouse does.  When you compare it may become clear that a few tasks need to move from one parent to the other. FOr us it was laundry- DH took over the laundry.   If this does not work and your DH is reluctant- arrange a week where you are gone and he has to do all of it.  I know several couples where the spouse was heavily discounting things the other was doing until she/he had to do it all.

Look at things you can outsource.  We have someone who mows our lawn and we have an every other week house cleaner.  That helps keep things in place and it take a load off the mind since you know the house is dirty,but you also know that the house cleaner is coming in two days- so you don't have to feel guilty about not doing more of it at that time.

Planning meals and dinners ahead of time helps during the week.  You can front load a few dinner in the ridge/freezer during the week end when things are less hectic.  Triple the recipe.  Have the first dinner the day you make it.  Have the second dinner later that week.  Have the third dinner the following week.  Do the same the next weekend and thereafter  and voila you have two dinners during the week in the bank.  Very little extra time since you had to make a dinner over the weekend anyway.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics