Reply to DS (7) swatted my hand at therapy- how do I discipline?

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Reply to "DS (7) swatted my hand at therapy- how do I discipline?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not following what you mean by reinforcing...[/quote]

NP here. Some kids (many kids?) repeat actions that get them attention, but they don't always distinguish between positive and negative attention. So a big reaction from mom (even if it's a negative reaction) will encourage (not deliberately, of course) the kid to repeat that action. [b]That's why the best advice is to ignore bad behavior (whenever possible, clearly you don't ignore dangerous behavior)[/b] and lavish attention on the behavior you want.[/quote]

So how do you define hitting by a child old enough to know better? Does it warrant being ignored?  Doesn't ignoring it teach the child they can get away with it?[/quote]

I would not define this behavior as dangerous. It didn't injure anyone and likely didn't even hurt; I would ignore it. Kids *want* to engage in behavior that pleases the adults in their lives (if they have the tools to do so), so I would lavish the praise (and perhaps actual prizes, if child needs additional motivation) when child handles frustration using words only and/or goes into therapist's office with appropriate behavior. Depending on the verbal and cognitive abilities of the child, I would discuss that plan (and the reward/incentive scheme) with child ahead of time. Teach a child what to do, not what not to do.[/quote]

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