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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op it is very noticeable that you don't even mention it hypothesize about why they don't like you, or why you think they don't like you, or what your DH says when you ask him why they don't like you. This is the big missing piece in this weird story. What is the reason? Or, why don't you seem curious about it? [/quote]

This is the part that doesn't make sense. Do they not think you're actually Jewish? Or is there something about you that they didn't accept from the beginning of your relationship? Like divorced, kids from previous relationship, your job, education, your family, something from your background....?

It sounds like you need counselling. That's not snarky at all - I see a therapist as needed.[/quote]

It sounds as though BIL and his wife were giving Op the cold shoulder from the get go.  You think Op needs counseling to figure out why people who barely speak to her and aren't particularly civil towards her don't like her?

Seems to me the ones with the issues are not Op.  It is understandable that Op's dh wants to see his parents and brother - he grew up with them, they raised him, of course he loves them.  But they also sound like manipulators who offer conditional love - on their terms only. He either takes it or leaves it. When they ask him to jump, it is his job to ask how high.

This has probably been the way it's been for Op's dh since before he met Op.  He doesn't recognize it as a problem because that is all he knows.[/quote]

It does matter what the reason is and, more to the point, whether OP and DH think there is any validity to it. If OP's perception is that her DH is blaming her, more or less, by saying that BIL used to include his previous girlfriends then does he think that her behavior is to blame? Or what? If it's something religious, do Op and her DH respect their view on that or not? If it's clear to everyone that they just don't like her for no reason at all, what is DH's justification for taking their side over OP's?[/quote]

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