Reply to Would like to hear from parents of older teens who were caught with marijuana

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is so tough. Not only is this person almost out of the house, [b]but what he's doing isn't even illegal in several places anymore[/b]. I think this is a really tough situation to be in as a parent, when the rest of the world is saying it's no big deal.  Given his age, and given the fact that you're talking about pot and not some "hard" drug, I really think the emphasis should be on the long term. Do you want a relationship with your adult son? v. "punishing a child" because he's almost out the door. I would just do a family heart-to-heart. He needs to hear your concerns. But he needs to learn from his own consequences as well. You can't protect him from all those. And, at his age, you shouldn't.

I also don't know what his near future holds. Is he going to college? Staying home? This is where the consequences come in for him. I wouldn't hesitate to make clear that I'm not paying for college tuition for a pothead who isn't going to class. Nor would I let him stay rent-free in the home after graduation, etc. [/quote]

[b]No, no the child is 17.  Still illegal even in states where pot is legal![/b]

OP, I wish you luck especially when the cavalier attitudes come out to chime in.  I smoked weed!  It isn't addictive! You are over reacting!

You are worried for your child so treat pot (illegal and addictive and damages immature brains) like you would any other illegal, addictive and damaging substance.  It won't be tolerated and until your child earns your trust back life will be tough.  Like the PP said, time to have a tough talk about the future.  We did the whole "won't be paying for college for a child who smokes pot" after the third time busting our son.  He had to take out loans which we will repay if he proves to us that he isn't smoking out all the time.  He is just back from freshman year and seems ok......will see if he can hold it together.  [/quote]  Correct, illegal until 21.[/quote]

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