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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you sure she's really divorced op? It's odd they don't have a set custody schedule. Now onto you. What kind of surprise trips and spontaneous outings do you plan? I started off wanting to like you, because I have fantasies of my husband whisking me off for a surprise weekend or trip. The reality is that she and any healthy woman isn't going to have all weekend open for you, and kids have nothing to do with it. There are two events I care about next weekend, a trivia competition and an air show. If you and I were dating and you "surprised" me with a trip, I'd not be real happy, at least not this weekend. Figure out if your "surprises" aren't a means of control. Then talk with her and figure out why she and the ex don't have a set schedule. That is the huge red flag here in my opinion. If you want to meet her kid, talk with her about that. Finally, know you can end the relationship for whatever reason you want. She can do the same. [/quote]

She said she's been divorced for two years and the reason they don't have a set schedule is because he has side jobs and he's not always available. She told me it works for them so I don't question it.

As far as the surprises go, I wanted to take her to the Poconos for a romantic weekend since she said she's always wanted to go. When it gets warmer maybe the beach for a day or even a romantic dinner or a dinner cruise. I was planning a spa day for her birthday that's coming up in a few weeks. I don't think it's controlling, I like to wine and dine the woman I'm dating. I believe in treating her like a Queen.[/quote]

I think you just don't get that women with primary custody of kids just don't get entire weekends free, let alone entire days.  If I were dating you, the best I might be able to do is swing a 4 hour window, maybe longer if it's night and I got a sitter.  I'd be thrilled if in those 4 hours your plan was a couples massage at a local spa.  Travel for a weekend with you would be out except for one or two carefully planned in advance weekends a year.  [/quote]

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