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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I've had both a different and a similar experience to yours, and I want to encourage you to reach out and build connections because I promise they're out there.

I grew up in a HUGE extended family and have a sibling who has children. Holiday get-togethers, growing up with nearby cousins, all of that. It was mostly wonderful and we still have an annual reunion that people faithfully attend.

BUT, I also live far away from all of them - my only doesn't see them regularly enough to build the kind of relationships that I had as a kid. And I wanted to have more children too, but couldn't and I do still grieve that.

Lucky for us, we have a long-term group of friends that we've known since before any of us were married or parents. We don't see each other as much, but still get together as much as we can. We also have an amazing group of neighbors and the posse of kids that we all have are growing up like cousins. And now that dd is in school, we've gotten to know some really wonderful families there too. We are fortunate to have close enough connections among all of these groups that they are like extended family, know each others' actual families, celebrate holidays together, and travel together. We can count on them to be there for us should we need it, and are glad to know that they feel the same about us. We have even chosen guardians from this group to take our dd should something happen to both me and dh. Having had both family and friend networks, I can fairly say that they feel quite similar to me as far as affection, loyalty, etc.

I bet if you cast your net a bit farther, you could have this too. It definitely isn't as easy as having ready-made connections like family provides, but it's nonetheless possible and very worth it. FWIW, there have also been occasions that we wanted to make more low-key and celebrated with just the 3 of us and they were fun too. We don't always get to pick our ideal circumstances, but there will always be good people who are glad to connect. Good luck![/quote]

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