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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thanks everyone. I can understand how it sounds like ADHD but he has a job with 10-13hr days that unfortunately can't be changed right now. On top of that he has a commute of about 45 min each way...luckily not a bad one bc its a nice 15 min walk and then 30 min drive. I knew him before he had this job and he was much more lets say well-rounded for lack of a better word. He is very afraid of losing his job and wants to do well at it so I do think he doesn't say no when others might. He is not totally paranoid bc he is an attorney and people do get laid off for low hours, etc.

I don't even really expect him to do more than he is doing. I just wish he would stop saying he would do things and then not. Our division of labor is pretty fair but it makes me insanely frustrated (and sets me back in what I am trying to get done) when he says he will do x,y,z and then doesn't bc in the meantime I could have done it myself or hired someone. Money is not free flowing so I know he is trying to save us a buck by doing things but he just doesn't appear to have the time. I think more than anything he wants to be the kind of person who can do stuff but then when it comes time to do it he is too tired or literally still at the office.[/quote]

I would lower your expectations for what he can feasibly get done. My MIL is like this. She will promise a million things and in her heart, I know she'd like to do them for us, but in reality, she can't make them happen. I have lowered my expectations such that when she actually does come through with something, I am pleasantly surprised! I also concur that it is probably undiagnosed ADHD/ADD.[/quote]

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