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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Even if this has been an ongoing thing, I still think it's OK to address it now. Simply saying something to the effect that [b]his behavior lately is extremely out of character[/b] and you've let it go thinking he was stressed, sick, whatever but now it's way out of hand.   I often tell my kids that I get it that they have a lot going on but being angry, tired, whatever it's no excuse to be rude to anyone.  If he lashes out I agree just to walk away from him or encourage him to walk away from you. I have usually good girls but they fall apart sometimes.   I simply say "clearly things aren't going well right now. I suggest you take a stroll upstairs and pull yourself together before one of us says something we'll regret".  That's usually enough to remind them that I'm not happy with their behavior and we don't want to make a big production of it.   I get that that doesn't work for all kids, especially ones that are known to be confrontational, but frankly your child doesn't seem to be generally a behavior issue anyway. I chalk this up to teenage drama but that doesn't mean you can't address it and insist he knock it off![/quote]

I think something like this is helpful to say to kids. I used to get so angry when my mother implied (or said) that I was "always" being rude or that I was a bad person for the way I was behaving. It made me very defensive: I WAS NOT always rude. I WAS NOT a bad person. At the same time, it made me feel like I was such a bitch all the time and even my mother knew it, which just made me more angry and upset.

It's much better if you can say, "Hey, this is so unlike you, you are usually so pleasant." Provokes less defensiveness and implies that you know a great kid is in there somewhere.[/quote]

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