Reply to How did you handle the disappointment of admission rejections in the past?

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[quote=pbraverman][quote=Anonymous]I'm in search of ideas of how to handle the disappointment of rejections that might come on March 3, 2017.

(We applied to a few stretch schools and 1 "safety" school.)[/quote]

In the simplest terms, I encourage you to think about what kind of person you want your child to be, with what kinds of values. And ask whether the school he or she attends — if it happens not to be among your top choices — will inhibit the development of those values and that person.

As somebody who has spent his career working in independent schools, I would say: If the answer to that last question is yes, I wonder if you might be relying too heavily on the school to instill those values and shape that person. You have much more influence than you think you do. If the answer is no, well, there you have the answer to your original question, yes?

Your child will be awesome if he or she has loving parents who encourage their children to find their passions and foster them, to learn from their mistakes, to treat others well. A particular school may provide particular opportunities, but not nearly so many as a child's family will. It's great to attend a favorite school, but your values will be intact no matter what schools decide. In fact, you could make an argument that those values will be tested and strengthened more by rejections than acceptances. But I know better than to make that argument. :)

Best of luck!
Peter

_____________________

Disclaimer: The anonymity here makes me uncomfortable; it's easy to be uninformed, personal, or simply mean-spirited if people don't identify themselves. For that reason, I have an account so you know whose words you're reading. I have more than 20 years' experience as a teacher and administrator in independent schools, and I hope I can be helpful to some folks. If you don't like something I've said, you're in good company — there's a long line of past students ahead of you. :) If you want to chat further, please feel free to contact me offline: peter &lt;at&gt; arcpd &lt;dot&gt; com[/quote]

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