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[quote=Anonymous]I can relate.  I have two older  brothers.  SIL #1  does not want him to have a relationship with anyone but the members of her own family.  SIL#2 has no such issues. 
 
SIL#1 does not seem to have a great relationship with her spouse, SIL#2 has a great marriage.  Both my brothers live in another country.  We see them once every couple of years.  It is unfortunate but this means that I have withdrawn from brother#1 to some extent.

I feel that the ball is in my brother's court as to how much he wants to remain in contact with me.  If he needs to do as exactly what SIL#1 wants him to do to have a peaceful marriage then he should do that. He is an adult and I do not want him to have a shittier marriage than he already has.

The reality is that you have no control of the kind of spouses your siblings get. These spouses have different upbringing and value systems.  In the end you hope that your siblings have happy marriages, but if they choose to remain with psycho spouses then that too is their choice. 
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