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[quote=Anonymous]People are missing that OP is a twin.  Twin relationships are unlike a typical sibling relationship, and so it's natural that she would be more hurt by this and possible, also, that her SIL feels more threatened by it.

I don't have much advice OP.  I have an older sister and younger brother (we're all spaced 4-5 years), and I do fear that SIL will try to distance my brother from me/our family.  She definitely feels like an outsider.  My parents are not helpful in this regard, though it's not from a place of malice.  It's just that my mom is overbearing even to my sister and me, and she treats SIL like she treats us...and SIL doesn't have to put up with it in the same way we do.  My sister and I have tried many times to tell my mom to lay off SIL, but she just can't help herself.  But it's true that none of us really likes SIL; sorry, this is the truth.  I would not be friends with her if my brother didn't marry her.  But I try to just be open with her and open with her.  Right now, I think she likes me best in the family, and totheger they visit me more often than anyone else (I also live closer but still plane ride away).  I don't know, it's hard. [/quote]

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