Reply to Ill Sister Wants Me to Take Her Kids vs. My Newfound Freedom

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, here. Thanks everyone for weighing in. This must be a first! It seems to be unanimous that I should take the girls. Believe me, I had already considered everything that was said here. Just looking for advice? confirmation?

--My sister was/is a horrible person, but I decided that has nothing to do with these girls (esp. her bio daughter) who have been nothing but sweet and absolutely adoring of me.

--There are other relatives that live in the same city as the girls but they live in the same less than ideal, squalid condition my sister did/does. I thought it might be better for them to go to my mother (who is willing to take them) because they're used to spending nights/time at Grandma's house, have cousins and aunties around. But again, none of them are doing any better than my sister. She clearly sees me as being in the best position to provide a better life and guidance.

--I have no idea who this father is. According to my mother he's an irresponsible alcoholic. Clearly if he stepped in to want his child I realize I have no claims on her, but I don't see that happening.

--I considered taking them to those great cities with me and we could all be cosmo girls and have tons of fun! But those cities are expensive and I want to them to have stability and be raised in the laidback quiet area I'm in.

--If everything goes through with the transfer and something happens to my sis, I'll likely just move with the girls. I'm afraid resentment might set in if I sacrifice the opportunity to for kids who are not biologically mine. Then again, the joy of raising them could be more fulfilling.

--Sis told my mom that even if nothing happens to her she still wants the girls to move and finish the school year with me because she can't even take care of herself. (I think she was talking financially, as a 13 year old and/or nurse could help physically. My mother also plans to move her in if she needs physical help, as there was talk of putting her in a nursing home.) I don't think I would take them unless she did not make it. I think my neice would be devastated if something happened to her mother while she lived far away-no matter how much fun she's having.[/quote]

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