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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm very sorry for what you're going through. My FIL passed away earlier this year. He was diagnosed with cancer last year and given six months to a year, and he went within that window. We live a six hour drive away or a one hour flight, and our kids were 1 and 3. Both DH and I worked full time at demanding jobs with a fair amt of travel (1-3 trips per month between the two of us). In a nutshell, DH did the best he could to be there and I did the best I could to be supportive. He flew up about once a month alone, plus any time his mom said it was urgent, he was there at the drop of a hat. The whole family flew up every 2 or 3 months, and we made one driving trip. We spent thousands on plane tickets. My oldest cried over missing daddy. We kept up our jobs. In other words, we did what we could.

The day before he passed, we already had plane tickets for the whole family to come up. My MIL called that morning asking if we could get an earlier flight. We couldn't realistically, due to flight schedules and transit time to the airport, so we came when we could. He was in bad shape when we arrived, but he recognized us and we got in hugs and a chance to say goodbye. My DH was up all night with his mom helping and FIL died the next morning. It was incredibly  sad and we came close to missing it. We were there by luck of the draw. I know DH had made peace with the possibility he would miss it beforehand, as we had talked about it. He did the best he could given his obligations to other aspects of his life. I know his father would have been proud.

Do the best you can. It is a hard time. [/quote]

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