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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  I have offered ex-DH to stop with the child support.  His money really doesn't make a difference one way or another.  Besides, next year DS will stick with only 2 activities as he's entering MS  and will be pretty busy.  With ex-DH it is the matter of "pride" that he's "financially helping" out.

Now on the subject of "how do the stepkids and stepmom know where he goes and what he does?"  How's he supposed to hide it?  "What did you for spring break?" - "Umm, nothing" and show up with a Florida tan.  Why is he supposed to lie?

I did recommend he stop it with the gifts other than on birthdays, esp. since the type of gifts he gives them are so different from what he gets.  On his 12th birthday he got a set of coloring books!  Really?  He's a 12-yr boy, not a 5-yr girl.[/quote]

OP, I am sympathetic to your situation generally speaking, but you are not coming off great here either. You have gone out of your way to denigrate your ex's family's choices regarding whether his second wife works, how they parent the other children, and you went well out of your way to point out the many ways that you are a better parent. That may be true, but don't be so smug about it, even here. [/quote]

The stepmom and her children go out of their way to make my DS feel uncomfortable and I should just swallow it?  Do you know that my DS doesn't want to go to that house anymore?  Do you know that I now have to spend time and effort convincing him to have a relationship with his father because he feels he doesn't have his back?  Yes, he's sensitive, but also kind-hearted, hard-working and honest.  And I've put up with a lot more from that family, I've been pretty accommodating. If I wanted to be "smug", I would've insisted that the CS was much higher than what he's paying now.

They have no right to discuss or be smug about where he's vacationing, what he's studying, reading, or playing.  I did not start denigrating her children, she did it with mine.  She called him spoiled, she called him "our little rich boy" to his face.  All with a smile.  [/quote]

This is what you have to focus on.  "Yes, DS is sensitive, but he is beginning to not want to have a relationship with his father because he doesn't like being picked on when he comes to your house.  You wouldn't like it either.  If you want to ruin the relationship you have with your son, I can't really do anything to stop you, but I will point out to you that you're doing it.  It needs to stop, or the consequences will be on you and on our son, not on me."[/quote]

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