Reply to My daughter is the only white girl in her grade: ask me anything

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is an honest question, though I know many people will jump on me for asking. We are at a school that is not as heavily Latino, but is majority AA.  And I don't think I have seen a single comment from you re: her cohort behavior.

At our school, the troublemakers in my daughter's grade (rising 4) are black (both middle and lower SES), with one or two exceptions (higher SES white boys). They disrupt class time and activities/performances with their behavior, they require the teachers spent a lot more time intervening and correcting and disciplining, and, in some cases, they are physical disruptive (pushing, kicking, etc.). It is not their skin color that bothers me but their behavior.

I must say, I was a little surprised that you neither commented on it, nor has anyone asked you about the beahvior of your child's classmates.
[/quote]

OP here.

I didn't talk about behavior because no one really asked about behavior. I couldn't tell from your post whether you have a rising 4th grader or a rising PK4 kid. Big difference, behavior-wise. Last year, we had three troublemakers in a class of 20. I wouldn't really categorize the behavior as bullying, and I tried to keep in mind that a lot of kids don't go to school at all until kindergarten, so K is very much a year for learning social behavior. One of the kids has an actual diagnosis, and I strongly suspect that he will spend more time with the special ed teachers this year as a result. I hope that they are able to help him. The other two kids were just sort of run of the mill badly behaved kids - taking stuff from other kids, saying things like "You look STUPID" or whatever. I haven't seen any age-inappropriate behaviors from DD's classmates.

Her teacher last year was very good at dealing with disruptive behavior. I know that the school recognizes that there are behavioral issues and has provided more training to teachers over the last couple of years and also prioritized social-emotional support for kids. We hired an extra social worker, for example, and our guidance dept spends time talking with kids about how to be a good friend, how to be a problem solver, how to not be a bully, how to express negative feelings productively, etc. They also have workshops throughout the year for parents about how to deal with all those things.[/quote]

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