Reply to I was an AP and now I'm a wife, AMA

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[quote=Vsubois19][quote=Anonymous][quote=Vsubois19][quote=Anonymous][quote=Vsubois19][quote=Anonymous]My mom's husband cheated with his childhood sweetheart. It was awkward bc she worked in my mom's drs office. He eventually left my mom. Seems happier they have been married for 16 or 17 yrs. He seems a lot happier. My mom was/is kind of a mess. She was crazy before the affair [/quote]

My dad left my mom for my aunt (my mom's brother's wife) and, although it was hard at the time, I also believe they are better off than if my parents staying together. [/quote]

That is so horrible!  Your dad and your aunt couldn't find other people?  If your dad and your mom needed to split, well sometimes that happens.  But what a betrayal.  [/quote]

We like to keep it in the family  :lol: luckily I grew up nonjudgemental so accepted that my dad was happier with my aunt/step-mom. It was nice to see him smiling again. [/quote]

I do judge people who have two paths to happiness: one that involves hurting another and one that does not, and then choose the path of hurt.  I'm okay with being that kind of judgmental.  He could have found someone who wasn't already part of your family to make him smile.  But it is healthier for you emotionally to find a way to accept the new structure of your family, so I'm glad you were able to do that. What happened wasn't your fault and it wouldn't be fair for you to have to carried the pain and sadness of the situation.[/quote]

It was horrible on my brother and I, mostly because my parents hated each other after the split - still do. My mom was devastated but she didn't really love my dad. If I think about it, she was emotionally abusive towards my dad. The hatred did affect me, which is why I took longer than most people to move along my career trajectory,[/quote]

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