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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Too often the issue is the messaging and related expectations.

Some new grandparents just want to come "visit and see the baby." [b]Nine times out of ten they view themselves as visitors/guests[/b]. Guests generally don't cook, grocery shop, do laundry, take out trash. Good guests do pick up after themselves but not everyone is a good guest.

New moms understandably, want anyone who visits to  "help" the family in helpful ways.

Communication, ideally beforehand, is key. Don't assume that what you or your own parent would do is what others will do.
[/quote]

That attitude is so alien to me.  When my parents visit, they don't expect to be catered to.  They see themselves as family, and they pitch in just like they would at home.  Ditto for us when we visit them.  Yes, we do things like stock their favorite foods and put clean sheets on the bed and think of some fun activities to suggest to them, because they are guests and we want their stay to be comfortable, but it would never occur to them not to just make a new pot of coffee if the pot was empty and they wanted more.  And frankly, as a result, we welcome their visits, we encourage them to stay as long as they like, and we look forward to seeing them, because they make themselves at home in all the best ways.  [/quote]

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