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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP. I haven't read the rest of the replies yet. I just wanted to share my perspective on this because I can kind of relate.

For some reason, after I got married (but not before) I started feeling kind of like you do about my husband's appearance. (I didn't feel that way before marriage). I think it was kind of an "oh, fuck, I really just gave up the possibility of going on dates with a well-dressed guy forever didn't I?" feeling.

So for several months in our first year of marriage, I felt a lot like you do. I stared at every unappealing thing I could find: The fact that his shirts always look too long in the arms, the fact that sometimes his shaggy hair can start looking little-boy like, his not perfect posture, his short answers when people ask him questions. I was driving myself crazy.

Then, I decided I had to stop paying attention to these things. And once I stopped allowing myself to dwell on these stupid things, I stopped noticing them. It worked for me, so you might consider giving it a try.

My experience lead me to realize that other people weren't seeing my husband the way I was seeing him when I was hyper-focusing on his appearance and presentation in front of others. They were seeing him the way I saw him before I married him - in a more wholistic way.

I am willing to bet it's similar for yours as well. I hope that helps, and good luck. [/quote]This is excellent advice![/quote]

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