Reply to S/O Elder care for parents who didn't provide child care

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[quote=Anonymous]
I'm the PP from many pages ago who posted about my own parents taking care of my grandmother, etc... and about her essentially using them.

A side note: not  only did my Dad pay to take care of his MIL , and let her live in his house for 20 years, but then said MIL and the rest of her family made fun of him and treated him with disrespect.

So, I learned that sometime you do the "right" thing, and everyone hates you for it. It can distance you from your kids because they hate seeing you mistreated and don't want to be involved in the situation--and realize that their Mom has picked her mother OVER her husband AND her children.

So, I think most posters are being wayyyy too hard on OP. It is a hard to see the other side if you have a good, loving family instead a messed up family. I'll never forget the day, in my 20s, when the FIRST therapist I saw said "you know your family is not normal, right?" I honestly had no idea.

Only the OP knows if her in-laws are out to use her for money and then trash her to the rest of their family and friends.

I act somewhat like my Dad and care about people, but have been used and treated like crap by my Mom's family for so long my give-a-damn is now broken. When my Mom dies, I want nothing more to do with any of them.

That's the outcome of my maternal grandmother coming to live with us and being 'taken care of" by my parents for 20 years.

If you have a loving, appreciative family OP, then take these other folks advice and go for it! (Doesn't sound like it from your original post though...)
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