Reply to Vent. I'm a slave.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think a lot of marriages would work out better if women just stopped being SAHMs, got a job they love and hired help to clean/do laundry. [/quote]

This does not solve everything.  I am a WOHM who makes more money than my husband but I still have the primary responsibility for coordinating everything.  We have a cleaning service  every 2 weeks.  Somehow it has fallen on me to decide what to eat for dinner, know when we're out of certain foods, do the laundry, be responsible for paying the preschool tuition and getting all the myriad of forms for both kids filled out, pack up most of the stuff for daycare, etc.

Examples:  if my husband does the dishes, he always manages to not see one.  He never changes the table mats (cloth) if our DC spills yogurt on it in the morning.  It'll just sit there until I take it upstairs to be washed and take out a new one to replace it.  He doesn't see the sticky spots on the kitchen table either or the crumbs on the floor yet he eats breakfast w/ her almost every morning while this is occurring.

Recently he had to drop my oldest off at preschool.  I gave him a check to give to them.  He forgot to do it and came home with it.  I was left scrambling so we wouldn't have to incur a late fee.

I called him as I was leaving work early to take our youngest to the doctor's office and  asked him if he could put the rice in the rice cooker so it'd be ready for our dinner last night as he was home before I was and it takes at least 20 minutes to do so.  He completely forgot.  This may sound like not a big deal but we have a very short window from getting home to work and getting 2 kids toddler and infant bathed, fed and ready for bed that it threw off our dinner plans.

Yes, I know he does a lot compared to other men, but that's a pathetic standard.  I'm not looking for him to do more than me, I'm just sick of having to do everything that I do and then having to suffer when he fails to do everything he said he would.  I am so pissed and fed up.  Times like this I am also really pissed at his mother because she raised 3 sons like this and it was almost deliberate as if this is your problem and I don't care if I send them out into the world w/o these skills.

To the original poster, I hear where you are coming from.  I used to do even way more before we had kids but I realized that he would never reciprocate in that way so I cut way back.  He's a grown man and last time I checked we had 2 kids not 3.[/quote]

You're partially to blame for this.  Stop doing all of the laundry and stop planning meals.  No one will die.  You're enabling him by continuing to do all of this stuff.  [/quote]

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