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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, here is another way to look at it.

I am a mom who loves to do the carpooling, the hosting etc.  Why? My son loves the company of other children, and many of the parents do not have the flexibility, energy, time that I do.  I love having the kids and parents over when I host.  And people always reciprocate in some form or the other.   It may not be the exact same thing that I can do - but parents will help out or include my child in some way or the other.  I have found that my kid loves when he has his other friends joining him for other activities.  If I am already doing everything for my kid - it does not cost me anything at all to include other people's kids as well.  And frankly, I really enjoy doing this for the kids.

People are not refusing to participate - they are just not participating the way you want them to.

[/quote]

This! I subscribe to this philosophy completely. [/quote]

That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. Ever. I don't know *anyone* who *likes* to drive.

This is D.C. - the *worst place* to drive!  No one likes to drive, but we do it, anyway.  If someone's child is overbooked with academic activities, maybe its time to try to comprehend a basic fact of life - social skills and socializing are just as crucial as any life skill.  Our job as parents is to make sure that our children have life skills, no?  What kind of parent does not value playdates; or values unnecessary, extra, academic classes over basic life skills of knowing how to get along with others?  It is this rather primitive idea of not valuing socialization that doe snot make sense, any way you look at it.

If all you care about is the almighty dollar, than let that be your incentive.  No one I know from top schools (I work in HR at a top firm, I will not say which for obvious reasons) - succeeds without basic social skills.  Period.  I see *all* types of resumes.

You can play semantic games and add extra academic classes all you want, but in the end, not valuing social skills makes you lose.  Some people seem to be taking offense to this; thinking their way is the only way, somehow.  It is just not realistic go keep your children boxed up in your world.

For the families whose parents did not like to drive, what was their reasoning?  Did they just think that they were too good for it?

[/quote]

I'm having a hard time making sense of this post. But -- I love to drive. FYI.[/quote]

I love to drive my kids and their friends to activities etc., mainly because I get an opportunity to see how the kids are interacting with each other, I get to understand their concerns and thought processes, I get to teach them things, and I just plain love to spend time with my kids and their friends. I have been very fortunate that my children have made friends with really cool kids, belonging to different races and religions and nationalities, and who are being raised by really great parents.  Besides, these children are very well mannered, high spirited, and super bright. I have a nice comfortable mini-van and driving the kids around does not vex me at all. I also love to drive and I am really mellow on the road because also get to tune in to some great music or NPR.

OP, when you have a family with several adult members (grandparents, parents, uncle, aunts) and several kids (siblings, cousins) etc,  the need for finding company outside the family diminishes.  Also, if the family has a social circle that is well established, sometimes there is no need to seek out new relationships.

Perhaps, what you are reacting to is that the car pooling, hosting etc., is more necessary for you, because you may have only one child and you are working etc,  and it would lighten your load,  but the other parents have no value for it because they have other venues for socialization and not having a carpool does not present them with any hardship.[/quote]

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